Here is an article worth reading. Written by Annie Patrick. Amie Patrick is wife to Darrin, lead pastor of The Journey
in St. Louis. Married for 20 years, Darrin and Amie have 4 children, ages 3 to
12, and have served in a variety of ministry roles together. Amie holds a
degree in music education and is passionate about leadership, teaching women to
practically apply the gospel to all areas of their lives, and helping pastors’
and church planters’ wives thrive in their calling. This is what she had to say.
Two months into my freshmen year of college, I was forced to
admit something had gone terribly wrong with the way I related to food. I’d
gained 30 pounds in that short time, double the stereotypical “Freshman
15” some students gain over the course of an entire school year. Deep down
I knew my weight gain wasn’t only the result of unhealthy cafeteria food or
insufficient exercise. I was eating constantly and compulsively for reasons I
didn’t understand—and I couldn’t stop. I felt completely condemned and
paralyzed with embarrassment, which I knew wasn’t helpful or biblical, but I
had no idea how to think otherwise. I was stuck.
admit something had gone terribly wrong with the way I related to food. I’d
gained 30 pounds in that short time, double the stereotypical “Freshman
15” some students gain over the course of an entire school year. Deep down
I knew my weight gain wasn’t only the result of unhealthy cafeteria food or
insufficient exercise. I was eating constantly and compulsively for reasons I
didn’t understand—and I couldn’t stop. I felt completely condemned and
paralyzed with embarrassment, which I knew wasn’t helpful or biblical, but I
had no idea how to think otherwise. I was stuck.
I spent the next 20 years seeking to understand a biblical
view of my body and of eating, as well as specifically examining how I’d ended
up so trapped and confused. I struggled, prayed, immersed myself in Scripture,
and repented. I sought out wise counselors, deep community, and biblical
resources. I tried all kinds of practical strategies with varying degrees of
success. I experienced seasons of freedom and moments of profound despair. I
wondered if lasting freedom was even a realistic possibility.
view of my body and of eating, as well as specifically examining how I’d ended
up so trapped and confused. I struggled, prayed, immersed myself in Scripture,
and repented. I sought out wise counselors, deep community, and biblical
resources. I tried all kinds of practical strategies with varying degrees of
success. I experienced seasons of freedom and moments of profound despair. I
wondered if lasting freedom was even a realistic possibility.
And then, a few years ago, I slowly began to realize my
struggle with food had gradually lessened and was no longer such an
all-consuming battle. My ups and downs leveled out. Food didn’t consume my
thinking, my weight was stable and healthy, and I no longer viewed myself with
shame and contempt. I certainly wasn’t perfect, but I was different. The little
victories had added up, and the stretches of freedom had grown longer and
deeper. Over time, I’d developed completely different beliefs and habits. I was
changed from the inside out. It wasn’t a flashy, overnight turnaround, but it
was definitely a miracle.
struggle with food had gradually lessened and was no longer such an
all-consuming battle. My ups and downs leveled out. Food didn’t consume my
thinking, my weight was stable and healthy, and I no longer viewed myself with
shame and contempt. I certainly wasn’t perfect, but I was different. The little
victories had added up, and the stretches of freedom had grown longer and
deeper. Over time, I’d developed completely different beliefs and habits. I was
changed from the inside out. It wasn’t a flashy, overnight turnaround, but it
was definitely a miracle.
What I know for sure is that these changes didn’t happen
because I had extraordinary willpower or because I finally found a diet fad
that magically worked for me. I am different today only because of God’s
transforming power in my life. Still, it took a long time for me see any
connection between the gospel and my struggles in this area. In hindsight,
however, it’s unmistakably clear that these truths were foundational to my
transformation and resulting freedom.
because I had extraordinary willpower or because I finally found a diet fad
that magically worked for me. I am different today only because of God’s
transforming power in my life. Still, it took a long time for me see any
connection between the gospel and my struggles in this area. In hindsight,
however, it’s unmistakably clear that these truths were foundational to my
transformation and resulting freedom.
Opportunity and Invitation to Experience Grace
In retrospect, I’m tremendously grateful for my struggles
with food and body image because God, in his great mercy, used them to bring me
to the end of myself. I was a high-achieving, performance-driven young woman
who hadn’t faced many challenges I couldn’t figure out how to overcome in my
own strength. I firmly believed my salvation was solely based on Christ’s
perfect life and death on my behalf. But my inability to stop destroying myself
with food brought my desperate sinful state into much clearer focus. It was
wildly uncomfortable, and I would have done anything at the time to fix myself.
with food and body image because God, in his great mercy, used them to bring me
to the end of myself. I was a high-achieving, performance-driven young woman
who hadn’t faced many challenges I couldn’t figure out how to overcome in my
own strength. I firmly believed my salvation was solely based on Christ’s
perfect life and death on my behalf. But my inability to stop destroying myself
with food brought my desperate sinful state into much clearer focus. It was
wildly uncomfortable, and I would have done anything at the time to fix myself.
Thank God I couldn’t! The moments when we run into the brick
walls of our own failure and inadequacy are not, as we so often believe,
opportunities to prove our own sufficiency. They are gracious chances to
experience strength, refuge, and power immeasurably beyond what we could ever
provide for ourselves.
walls of our own failure and inadequacy are not, as we so often believe,
opportunities to prove our own sufficiency. They are gracious chances to
experience strength, refuge, and power immeasurably beyond what we could ever
provide for ourselves.
Not Changed by Modifying Behavior
I didn’t struggle with food because I simply needed more
information about healthy eating. I was an expert at counting calories,
measuring portion sizes, and making healthy choices. And I didn’t struggle with
my weight because I was lazy or uninformed about exercise. At my heaviest
weight, I was exercising rigorously on a daily basis. I overate to escape from
the tremendous pressure I felt to perform and please in order to have the
approval of others. I overate because I believed I needed the comfort of food
in times of stress, sadness, or anxiety.
information about healthy eating. I was an expert at counting calories,
measuring portion sizes, and making healthy choices. And I didn’t struggle with
my weight because I was lazy or uninformed about exercise. At my heaviest
weight, I was exercising rigorously on a daily basis. I overate to escape from
the tremendous pressure I felt to perform and please in order to have the
approval of others. I overate because I believed I needed the comfort of food
in times of stress, sadness, or anxiety.
Only when I was willing to look deeply at the root causes of
my disordered eating and honestly confess my sin and unbelief did anything
start to change. Until then, I was stuck in the garden of my heart, pulling out
the same weeds day after day and getting nowhere. Pulling weeds is important,
but it’s only one part of growing a beautiful garden. I didn’t just need to
change a few habits or drop a few pounds; my belief system needed to be
uprooted and replanted with biblical truth. Responsible stewardship of our
physical bodies is clearly biblical, but trying to achieve this goal by
focusing solely on changing outward habits doesn’t work for those living from a
belief system that opposes the transforming truth of Scripture. The greatest
need of a person caught in a trap is rescue, not a strategy for
trap-management.
my disordered eating and honestly confess my sin and unbelief did anything
start to change. Until then, I was stuck in the garden of my heart, pulling out
the same weeds day after day and getting nowhere. Pulling weeds is important,
but it’s only one part of growing a beautiful garden. I didn’t just need to
change a few habits or drop a few pounds; my belief system needed to be
uprooted and replanted with biblical truth. Responsible stewardship of our
physical bodies is clearly biblical, but trying to achieve this goal by
focusing solely on changing outward habits doesn’t work for those living from a
belief system that opposes the transforming truth of Scripture. The greatest
need of a person caught in a trap is rescue, not a strategy for
trap-management.
Christ Alone Brings Freedom and Contentment
It was a humbling day when I realized that, while I believed
the previous statement in theory, my life told a different story. We’re all
tempted in one way or another to justify ourselves apart from Christ, whether
with good behavior, success in a certain area, or consistency in meeting a
particular standard. Though I never would have said it so blatantly, I
functionally believed that in addition to being loved and accepted in Christ, I
had to achieve mastery over food and my physical body in order to experience
joy or peace. Scripture is clear that food and our bodies are gifts, but it’s
impossible to view them this way when we turn them into rulers we constantly
measure ourselves against. I began to understand how I pridefully acted as
though Christ’s work wasn’t really sufficient; that I had to add something of
my own in order for it to be enough. When I finally began consistently resting
in the reality that I truly had nothing to earn and nothing to prove,
miraculously, food began to lose its power, and my body became a gift for which
I was truly thankful.
the previous statement in theory, my life told a different story. We’re all
tempted in one way or another to justify ourselves apart from Christ, whether
with good behavior, success in a certain area, or consistency in meeting a
particular standard. Though I never would have said it so blatantly, I
functionally believed that in addition to being loved and accepted in Christ, I
had to achieve mastery over food and my physical body in order to experience
joy or peace. Scripture is clear that food and our bodies are gifts, but it’s
impossible to view them this way when we turn them into rulers we constantly
measure ourselves against. I began to understand how I pridefully acted as
though Christ’s work wasn’t really sufficient; that I had to add something of
my own in order for it to be enough. When I finally began consistently resting
in the reality that I truly had nothing to earn and nothing to prove,
miraculously, food began to lose its power, and my body became a gift for which
I was truly thankful.
As I’ve shared my story with others, I’ve been both
comforted and also concerned by the reality that my struggles in these areas
aren’t unusual or uncommon. Battles with food and body image manifest
themselves in a wide variety of ways. They are a significant problem the body
of Christ must carefully and lovingly address. My hope is that we won’t only
point people to important practical strategies for change, but that the deep
truths of the gospel will serve as a foundation for all of our efforts.
comforted and also concerned by the reality that my struggles in these areas
aren’t unusual or uncommon. Battles with food and body image manifest
themselves in a wide variety of ways. They are a significant problem the body
of Christ must carefully and lovingly address. My hope is that we won’t only
point people to important practical strategies for change, but that the deep
truths of the gospel will serve as a foundation for all of our efforts.
For those who seek lasting change and freedom, there is no
other option.
other option.
